| Wednesday, April 13th, 2005 |
| 7:59 pm |
wow i never write in here anymore. i don't have the time nor the care to. but in case anyone was wondering, i am fantastic. my apartment is my home. it's beautiful. my job is ok i guess haha. i make good money. ryan and i are still married, of course! i love him to death as always. i hang out with completly different people and i love them.and uhhhhhhhhh thats about it. haha. i have nothing to say in this stupid thing. i miss poops. and kelly r. you assholes. |
| Tuesday, July 27th, 2004 |
| 5:34 pm |
I don't give a shit if I wake up tomorrow or not. |
| Sunday, July 18th, 2004 |
| 3:14 am |
.yum.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Sting. Let that go on the record as the BEST dream I've ever had. Current Mood:  drunkCurrent Music: sdfh |
| Wednesday, July 7th, 2004 |
| 3:53 pm |
i miss my better half :( terribly. |
| Tuesday, June 15th, 2004 |
| 1:41 am |
.umhm.
today ryan and i played an intense and i mean INTENSE game of peanut under the safety of my garage while it was pouring like a bitch, hailing, lightning and thundering. intense. what? Current Mood:  lovedCurrent Music: watching law and order |
| Wednesday, May 5th, 2004 |
| 3:27 pm |
.so tired.
things have gotten out of hand. i think that's the best way to describe it. maybe not but whatever. i feel so shitty since coming back. i wish it didn't happen. but i can't erase it and i'm on the verge of tears constantly. my brain and my heart...are shot. my body too. i can't eat without getting a stomach ache that's the worst ever. so i just drink shit loads of coffee to stay awake. i chain smoke. my allergies are flaring up. i wish i never told anybody. i'm sorry i hurt you all. i'm sorry my brother stayed longer to be with me but i couldn't stand being around for more than 2 hours a day. the first day back made me realize how much i hurt everyone. i couldnt bear to be around it. all i do is cause pain. i feel like this is all my fault. it probably is. i cant control my emotions. or my brain or my hands or fucking anything. i wish this never happened... |
| Thursday, April 15th, 2004 |
| 2:48 pm |
ive found the one person to spend the rest of my life with. and he feels the same. perfect. |
| Monday, March 29th, 2004 |
| 11:17 am |
saturday night....AMAZING!! party was the best. sunday night...AMAZING!! indian food and then seeing dead prez. fun weekend. so glad to be home. |
| Sunday, March 21st, 2004 |
| 8:45 am |
as soon as bob calls i'm off to virginia. see you guys in a month!! suckkkerrsss and my boyfriend is the fucking best. he slipped a cute note and $100 in my purse this morning. i'm going to miss that boy. i wish i got some sleep last night. Current Mood:  exhausted |
| Wednesday, March 17th, 2004 |
| 2:50 am |
soo
so things have been crazy here. busy. working. thinking. planning. talking... my life is nuts. i've been working my ass off. i love my job, it's so rewarding. it's harder than it sounds. it will never end. i get to learn something new everyday. i work for the environment, i couldn't ask for anything more. our campaign is picking up county by county. it's amazing to see politicians come to us, looking to clean up, because of the work we've done. WE did. some kids that care. kids that actually want to try and do something about it, instead of pretending to just care. it's amazing, like a dream job. and it's mine. and time consuming haha. mikey and i...yeah well, we're getting our old apartment back on roosevelt in august. new kitchen, new bathroom, new 3rd roomate(still up in the air). amazing. that was the best times. and it's ours again. habeeb, you're the best, thank you for saving it for us. that brings me to having to come up with $300 deposit by friday...good luck kim. (i can pull it off) ive been running around meeting with habeeb and mikey and getting this shit rolling. and it's rolling. i'm good. things with ryan are amazing. we don't see each other as much though, conflicting work schedules. it's getting easier. i love him to death and i'm so grateful to have him, and to know he loves me. we are going to go on vacation together this summer/fall. for his birthday. i hope anyways, if all goes well haha. i'm going to miss him. which brings me to this. on sunday...i'm leaving. bob's the best and i'm catching a ride with him to virginia. going to be with chuck for a little while, cheer him up. or at least try to. i'll be gone till about the 19th or so of april. i'm going to work when i'm down there for a little while. when i come back, i'll be in belize and yucatan and cozumel. in the rainforest. my fucking dream. and after that, back to work. my job is going to let me come back. peter..you're the best boss. my life is weird right now, it feels almost like it's coming together but really its going in a million different directions. picking up and moving for a month is awesome and random and sad. but its something i have to do. and need to, and will. everything is changing, everything has changed. really, i have no idea whats going on. i just know what im doing. that statement makes sense to me, probably no one else. whatever. i'm going to NOT miss syracuse. but ryan, yeah, ryan i'm gonna miss. if our relationship makes it through this, i'll have so much more faith in it than i already do. it'd be great. this is the longest, stupidest entry ever. but that's ok. take care all. i'll see you around. <3 Current Mood:  confusedCurrent Music: some stupid movie in the background. |
| Wednesday, March 10th, 2004 |
| 12:22 pm |
.aw.
i don't care if today is bad. i don't care if everyone in rochester sucks a dick like the past few days. i dont care about their apathy. because if i start to, i'm just going to remember last night and this morning and how in love i am. hahah. when did i ever get so lame. |
| Sunday, March 7th, 2004 |
| 10:16 pm |
sort of a rough weekend. ok, well just a rough saturday. i'm a bad friend i'm a bad girlfriend. i'm sorry everyone. |
| Saturday, February 28th, 2004 |
| 12:49 pm |
|
| Monday, February 23rd, 2004 |
| 12:12 pm |
i feel hopeless. i know what i want but i know how this works and i know i'll never get it. i can see it but that's the closest i'll ever get. |
| Saturday, February 21st, 2004 |
| 2:29 am |
after tonight i realized something i'm really really in love. <3 p.s. i really liked the way my pets reacted to him, and the way he reacted to them. it makes me love him even more as stupid as that is, they are my pets god dammit. |
| Wednesday, February 11th, 2004 |
| 6:49 pm |
i am officially losing my fucking mind and on the brink of a terrible nervous breakdown and its just too fucking funny to me. |
| Tuesday, February 10th, 2004 |
| 1:45 pm |
i realized after last night how fucking lucky i am. 2 amazing guys in my life, one a best friend and one a boyfriend. i am grateful and couldnt ask for anything more. for the first time in my life i feel safe and loved. Current Mood:  grateful |
| Monday, February 9th, 2004 |
| 3:18 pm |
sundays are supposed to be my bad days. and sunday was a perfect day. i woke up after an amazingly fun two nights and went to ryans. we watched a movie and then layed in bed and read and hung out. it was awesome. things just keep getting better and better so why did i wake up this way today? im sick of this. |
| Monday, February 2nd, 2004 |
| 6:53 am |
ryan theodore you are my saving grace and i love you for that. Current Mood:  calmCurrent Music: crap! |
| Sunday, February 1st, 2004 |
| 12:28 am |
the plans are as follows: get tax return money buy camera off of jamie get job save up a little bit of money, bout $300 and then i'm getting the fuck out of here for just a little while. this plan makes me happy. life right now does not, im cheating myself left and right here. syracuse does not either. the end. fuck yoouuuuuu |
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